Because you can't have depths without surfaces.
Linda Grant, thinking about clothes, books and other matters.

Saturday, 19 July 2008

The woman who spent £3000 to get a flat stomach . . . read on

from the Times

I remembered an article I had read by a journalist whose similarly stubborn belly was “melted away” by Smartlipo; she'd had it done in the lunch-hour in New York. Two weeks later, she wrote, she was patting her “concave” belly and flaunting herself in a new bikini. After a week's deliberation I booked a consultation at a private clinic in London, one of the top British places for Smartlipo. While waiting for my consultation I was handed a cuttings book full of similar testimonials. It was going to cost £3,000, but even before I saw the expert, I was sold. Yippee, I thought, I'm on my way to a concave belly.
. . .

One would have thought that after not one but two sessions of Smartlipo, and fat removal, my stomach would resemble Keira Knightley's. Alas, no. Perhaps it is my age. Perhaps it is my lifestyle. You know how debauched journalists are. Well, maybe, but I spent six months training for, and ran, the London Marathon this year. In under four hours.

What a silly waste of money

Perhaps it is my genes. Anyway, what a silly waste of money; and what a potential risk, having an intrusive procedure done to my healthy body that was deemed necessary because I deemed it thus. I put the experience behind me and resigned myself to loving my tummy. Then I went on a press trip to St Tropez, where, lo and behold, I bumped into the journalist who had written the original Smartlipo testimony that had so encouraged me. And do you know what, she wasn't wearing a bikini.

“Oh, Smartlipo! It didn't work for me either,” she laughed. After I had picked myself off the floor, I asked her what she would suggest instead of Smartlipo. “There are cheaper, less invasive ways of getting a flat stomach. Do Pilates and yoga, and stop eating so much sugar and drinking so much. Then spend the £3,000 on a holiday!”


Rosaria said...

Ive been doing Pilates sporadically for many years, and when I do actually focus on regular workouts, my child-wrecked abdominals are vastly improved and my stomach as flat as can be expected. Almost worthy of a bikini, but then there are other recently acquired wobbly bits elsewhere....must be getting old...

I had always wondered about lipo, and now feel relieved that a bit of crunching and physical hard work really is the better way. And laying off the drink a bit, salt and trans fats etc.

Deja Pseu said...

Better yet, make moderately healthy food choices (most of the time), get some exercise daily, and quit worrying about whether your abs measure up to some underweight actress. And yes, take that money and go on vacation, or start a home-based business, or buy shoes for needy kids or something. A "concave belly" is not a natural state for any woman over 12. We need to get over this. (sorry for the rant, but the older I get the nuttier this all seems.)

Deja Pseu said...

I should note that my rant was was in response to the original article, not to rosaria's comment.

Arabella said...

My reaction to the article was - oh make yourself have a different fantasy: collect and model fetching all-over bathing costumes. Better still, take holidays away from the beach - it's bad for your skin anyway. Give that 6 thousand to a women's refuge - it'll do amazing things for your posture and that will improve your silhouette.
Good grief.