Because you can't have depths without surfaces.
Linda Grant, thinking about clothes, books and other matters.
Pure Collection Ltd.
Net-a-porter UK

Thursday 1 May 2008

Update on evil


The location of the moth infestation has been isolated to the hall carpet at the top of the stairs. They are breeding in the place where the carpet meets the wall and subsequently massing into the bedroom where there is a scrumptious banquet of cashmere and other items..

The following actions have been taken:

1. With my moth genocide kit I first sprayed clouds of deadly moth exterminator about.
2. Next I sprayed the walls and carpet with insecticide
3. Next I hoovered up a lot of dead and dying moths and applied a crevice tool to the carpet
4. Then I set down traps, which are little open cages with a sticky strip on them dosed in something which attracts male moths in the hopes of some high class nookie, But actually kills them. The females fly about uselessly with no moth Mr Darcy to impregnate them, like characters out of Bridget Jones or Sex in the City.

The result today is that there are lot of dead moths in the traps and lying around on the carpet and no signs as yet of any live ones.

But our enemies are legion and they are cunning and cruel. I do not believe we have reached VE day yet.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Never give up.

Linda Grant said...

Exactly. We will fight them on the carpet, we will fight them on the ceiling, we will fight them in the wardrobe. And we will never surrender.

Though since it's me that's trying to implement the Final Solution on the moths, I feel uncomfortably as though I'm on the Other Side.

materfamilias said...

you might also like to know that cashmere-eating moths don't like sunlight (they love closets and drawers 'cause the darkness is their preferred nursery). As a knitter, I periodically scoop up woolen treasures for a bit of sunbathing, and you might consider it for those luxury items you'd rather not spray toxins on. Bon courage!

Miss Janey said...

They are DEVIIILS and must be stopped.

Anonymous said...

I guess so - though I always thought genocide was evil, no?

But are they really "gens"?

Yes, I know the Nazis referred to "Untermenschen" such as Jews and Roma as vermin, but that doesn't mean that anti-Nazis have to call vermin humans...

As for knitwear, and even coats, yes, a sunbath is a very good idea.

I take it this is woollen carpeting that cannot be taken up? On the advice of a friend from Morocco, I do wash my oriental rug by hand (in the bath) and hang it outside over the back balcony (you may remember Montréal, where blocks of flats typically have spiral staircases and balconies front and back - the back one is used for such "service" purposes... )

Elizabeth said...

How about cedar balls, or lavender? Forgive me if you've already heard these before, or if you've tried them to no avail.

I'm very sorry to hear of your problem. I vote to get all your woolens out of the house!

Anonymous said...

I hope the carpet will not need to be replaced. That would drive me over the edge.

However, I have total confidence VM day will be achieved!

Anonymous said...

Bomb the B*$£*!"ds! Foggers sprays traps and megga doses of Diptique Lavander spray on cotton sweater bags, Hoover like a demon and trap them in pheremone lures, spray commom areas like stairs and halls
brush favourite jackets and coats reguarly and do'nt leave prised possessions lying, freeze sweaters a tis Armegdon round at my place - why do they pick on us? is it because we dont wear Acrylic!?