The Guardian's resident doctor today advises a reader who wishes to take revenge on her no-good cheating ex-boyfriend. Possessing a highly developed imagination, I particularly enjoy revenge fantasies though I have never actually carried one out. Some years ago, when discussing a particularly obnoxious ex with a friend, she told me a story which I am sure is an urban legend, but still, it shows the extent to which human ingenuity can be stretched, and far more satisfying and ethical than bunny-boiling:
Woman's boyfriend cheats on her with best friend, then leaves her, moves in with best friend. Woman finds way of getting into house. She unscrews the knobs at the end of the curtain rod and into the hollow tube she inserts, at regular intervals, several fresh shrimp. The knobs are put back on and quickly the shrimp decay causing a dreadful smell. The couple take the place apart looking for dead rats, cats etc, find nothing. Call in professionals who draw a blank. In despair they move, taking with them the curtain rod.
